Well, it's happened! My baby is one! I remember in the first few days of motherhood, holding my baby who was still a bit of a stranger to me and thinking, In a year I'll have a one-year-old. This will feel completely normal by then.
It does feel normal now, but it still feels surreal too. I still can't believe he is ours. Every day he changes and becomes more himself. I love seeing him transform, but it also makes me so nostalgic for the earlier days. When we were trying to get pregnant I listened to a podcast called The Longest Shortest Time, and the name of that podcast is so incredibly apt for what the first months of motherhood feel like when you're in them, and then in retrospect. I can hardly remember the first two months of his life. Looking back I was in such a DAZE. I am so grateful I had the love and support I did during those weeks and months.
The other day my best friend, Elizabeth, asked me how I was feeling about Wesley turning one. "Fine!" I said. "I feel like I already mourned the loss of my baby when he started walking at 9.5 months!!" And that's true... I've been thinking about this milestone for a long time. It feels like Wesley has been in our lives for ages, and yet the day he was born feels like yesterday. I am a completely nostalgic person on any given day, so I'm sure it'll strike me here and there. But more than anything I am so grateful for this life. The last two years have been a whirlwind, and trying on many many occasions. But the absolute best thing I've ever done was to bring this boy into the world. He makes me laugh every single day and I see the world differently with him in it.
I love you Wesley Blair! My wish for you is that you can hold onto the magic, joy and curiosity you exhibit every day. You are wild, stormy, funny and sweet. It is a privilege to be your mom. Happy birthday, sugar!
Here's a slideshow of his first year!
I couldn't be happier with his one year photos. First off, I'm so glad I did them myself! I am obviously a huge proponent of hiring another professional to capture memories for you, but the two hours Conner, Wes and I spent taking these photos were SO much fun. He was so funny and happy running around a nearly-empty, stark room. He was squealing, screeching and running laps around me. The photos are some of my favorites I've taken of him, and as you can see from the video above, I've taken plenty (and that was just a fraction of them)! I am also glad I had Conner snap some of Wesley nursing. He only nurses in the morning and occasionally before bed now. Our nursing days are definitely numbered, and I will miss that bond when he's through!
My baby is so grown up!